Hey Detroiters, welcome back to Culture Canvas!
As a professional storyteller and artist, Satori Shakoor has never shied away from taboo topics. The Detroit native is the founder and executive producer of storytelling platform The Secret Society of Twisted Storytellers and she’s the host of “Detroit Performs Live” on Detroit PBS.
But two years ago, when Shakoor was doing her one-woman comedy show at Detroit Public Theatre, she wasn’t sure how people would react. Titled “Confessions of a Menopausal Femme Fatale,” the show delved into Shakoor’s journey through that transitional time in her life, as well as the mental and emotional toll women often face during menopause and society’s aversion to letting women age.
But Shakoor, 71, wanted to create something that other women could relate to and show them that they’re not going through menopause alone. The result is “Confessions of a Menopausal Femme Fatale,” a filmed version of her 2023 show. Released June 12, the movie is available to rent or buy on Amazon Prime Video, Apple TV+ and Google Play.
I talked to Shakoor about the idea for “Confessions of a Menopausual Femme Fatale,” getting distribution for the film and how menopause changed her life.
Editor’s note: This interview was lightly edited for length and clarity.
BridgeDetroit: When did you get the idea to do “Confessions of a Menopausal Femme Fatale”?
Shakoor: When I was first going through the symptoms of perimenopause, I noticed that I didn’t recognize myself. I was having hot flashes, mood swings, night sweats, palpitating heart, brain fog, all these scary sort of symptoms. And when I asked my mother, she didn’t remember (going through it). When I asked other older women, they said that they were too young, and they clearly weren’t. I had no information about it, and I had to navigate this whole terrain by myself. I wanted to go through it and then on the other side, write about it, so that women coming behind me would have something. Every woman will have a different experience of symptoms, but I wanted there to be something for them and they wouldn’t have to go through what I went through.
My film is not about pharmaceuticals, it’s about spirituality, forgiveness, the addressing of regret and other taboo subjects that women don’t talk about: postpartum depression, performing for the male lens, mother-daughter, relationships. It’s my story, and so that’s the journey that I take people on. It’s sort of a roller coaster of emotions.
BridgeDetroit: Why did you decide this show was something people should have the option to watch at home?
Shakoor: After I wrote it and I decided I was going to perform it as a piece of theater, it was exhausting because I’m a theater artist, and we in professional theater do eight shows a week. Even if it was only five shows a week, it was an exhausting show to do emotionally and physically, and I really wanted to have something that could live forever. The whole process of getting your film in the theater and going through festivals is very difficult, but my vision was always to have it on streaming, so women could watch it together or they could watch it by themselves. So, I did it because this way it can go global, it’ll reach as many women as possible and this way, it lives.
BridgeDetroit: When did you start noticing that you were going into menopause?
Shakoor: I was 45, living in Toronto and I had always been a gym rat. I always looked younger than I actually was and I was wearing crop tops and I had a six pack. But menopause…doesn’t announce itself. One day it was there, and I heard this voice that said, ‘You don’t have no business showing your belly button at 45’ and I’m like, ‘Where did that voice come from?’ And all of a sudden, I didn’t feel comfortable showing my belly button. And then I started to notice some facial hair and I started to notice that I wasn’t nice anymore. And not only was I not nice, I didn’t care that I wasn’t nice. I was saying exactly what was on my mind. I was alienating co-workers and fake friends, and I would wake up in the morning and tell myself, ‘You have to apologize to at least three people today.’ I would have mood swings, catch myself off guard and go off on people. I just didn’t know how to manage all of these new ways of trying to express myself.
Therefore, I really wanted to understand this stage of life. I wanted to leave something for other women, because if you don’t know what’s going on with you, you can’t be responsible for it. If you know that you’re having a mood swing and you are erupting, you can get support from people around you – your loved ones, your husband, your children, your co-workers. And you can apologize to people, but you can let them know, ‘I’m going through this stage of life, and these are some of the things that occurred’ so that you’re not going off on people and then coming home and being scared of yourself or what you might unleash on the world.
BridgeDetroit: How did menopause affect your relationships with your family and friends?
Shakoor: With my mother, we became friends. When she was 50 and I was 14, she was going through perimenopause when I was going through puberty, so we were on opposite sides of womanhood. The house was rocking with hormones and we clashed. I called her Dracula because she just sucked all the fun out of my teenage life. But when I got into my 40s, I realized I blamed my mother for every wrong choice, everything that went wrong in my life. One day we were on the phone having a big argument, and I realized I was still blaming my mother for my life choices, and that’s when I decided to take responsibility for my life. And it didn’t happen overnight, but eventually we became friends. I could talk to my mother like I talked to any of my peer friends, and it just expanded the possibility of our friendship. Menopause changed my relationship with my mother, changed my relationship with the world, and particularly with myself.
BridgeDetroit: You filmed the comedy special in 2023. What have the last two years been like trying to get distribution for the film?
Shakoor: Every step of the way, I had no idea where to go. I didn’t know any film companies, directors, producers. I eventually got distribution through Tubi, but when I signed on with my PR team, Tubi couldn’t give a release date. They (the PR team) felt that they couldn’t really promote the film in the fashion that they wanted to, so I got Tubi to release me from the contract and they recommended a distributor to me – Bitmax. Bitmax offered me a way better deal to stream on Amazon, Apple TV+ and Google Play. And whatever revenue I would reap from the film would come back to me 100%, whereas the distributors for Tubi wanted to take 20%.
BridgeDetroit: What kind of reception have you been getting from family, friends and the community since the film was released?
Shakoor: I’ve been getting so many calls, and not only have family and friends reviewed it, other outlets, film reviewers, have given good reviews. I’m over the moon about it because my fear was, ‘Will this engage people, me just standing up there, telling my story?’ It really warmed my heart when a friend of mine called me and said, ‘My niece came over and she was only going to stay a few minutes, but when I started showing her the film, she stayed until the last credits rolled.’ Another friend of mine said she watched it with her husband and he never sits down and watches anything with her. And then he watched it all the way to the end. It’s those kinds of stories that make a difference for me.
As always, have a great week and stay cool!
Cheers,
Micah
313 Scene
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What’s Going on in the D?
- New event United We Slay will close out Pride Month with multiple celebrations at 11 venues across Metro Detroit from Thursday to Sunday. Events include a launch party at Halo Bar and Lounge on Detroit’s west side, a queer mixer at Ferndale bar Soho, a field day and health expo with Stonewall Sports at Geary Park in Ferndale and a “RuPaul’s Drag Race” live event at Five15 in Royal Oak. A majority of the events are free to attend, and VIP tickets and solicited donations will raise funds for the ACLU of Michigan in honor of transgender drag queen Golden O’Hara-Polo, who died in April.
- Detroit Foundation Hotel is hosting a wine-tasting event called “Side by Side” from 6:30-8:30 p.m. Thursday. The event will put classic varietals head-to-head, giving guests the chance to explore how geography, climate, and tradition shape the wines we love. Guiding your palate will be sommelier Alex Sachanko, pairing pours with delicious bites crafted by Executive Chef Rece Hogerheide. The event is almost sold out, with only the 6:30 p.m. slot still available. Tickets are $50.
- Michigan Central is back with the third edition of its monthly music series, Fridays at the Station. This month will feature a special edition of the event, with a full-scale takeover by the legendary Peoples Records, which is joining the station as a new retail partner. Beginning at 5 p.m., the night will feature DJ sets by Peoples Records, as well as performances by Detroit acts Balance, a collaborative duo between saxophonist Marcus Elliot and pianist Michael Malis, and pianist, producer and composer Ian Fink. Tickets are $15.
- The Redford Theatre is showing a screening of the 1996 movie, “The Birdcage” at 8 p.m. Friday. The film follows a gay cabaret owner (Robin Williams) and his drag queen companion (Nathan Lane) who must pretend to be straight when their son introduces them to his conservative fiancé’s parents. Before the show, moviegoers can play some drag queen bingo, and there will be a special drag performance at intermission. Tickets are $15.
- Concert of Colors, in collaboration with WDET-FM, Gilbert Family Foundation and Verizon, are hosting a free concert in Mexicantown 1-8 p;.m. Saturday at Mexicantown CDC Mercado Plaza. The day will celebrate Detroit’s Tejano artists, the popular Tex-Mex genre originating in central and south Texas and northeastern Mexico. Performances include Ruben Garza, Tatyana D’Voce, Mariachi Oro Y Plata and Armando Vega.
- The Detroit Symphony Orchestra is hosting the Clark Park Culture and Arts Festival beginning at 1 p.m. Saturday. The free event will feature a lineup of food, music and dance – including musicians from the DSO, local artists, and students from Southwest Detroit. Interactive arts workshops run from 1-4 p.m.